Hello everyone!
When I starting this blogging thing, I said, "YES! Finally a way to get all my thoughts out on paper, maybe make someone laugh, or just connect with someone who I thought I had nothing in common with." I also realize that you actually need to post things... LOL.
So, here I am, 10:03 on a sunday night after realizing that I missed Game of Thrones and didn't record it, and having the night-time snacking urges like I'm facing the electric chair tomorrow, and having a whole lot of things to say.
What's new? My new job starts in 2 weeks (can I get an amen?), so I've been dealing with that. But, its going to be great! After 2 nerve wracking interviews and completely re-writing my resume from scratch, its finally happening! I will admit, that I'll miss my whole team very much and will probably be a crying mess on my last day, but they have taught me so much about everything you can imagine and have been so supportive of my new transition that I could never thank them enough.
On a less professional thought, Buzzfeed recently made a video about not being "that girl". It's really stuck with me the past 2 weeks and perhaps changed some outlooks on my own life and thoughts. When I watched the video I cried a bit (but I cry all the time so that really isn't anything new), so thanks for all the feels Buzzfeed on my bus ride home, I'm sure I looked like the most emotionally stable person in the whole world. Oh, and here's the link because I know you're all dying to watch this.
http://www.buzzfeed.com/dayshavedewi/this-video-is-for-every-woman-who-has-never-felt-like-that-g?bffbvid&utm_term=4ldqpj5#.xap8m2B3Y
I have never been THAT girl. I have never wanted to be. I'm sure in high school and maybe a year or 2 in college sure, but now? Hell no. Of course, I've always been told by society that I needed to be a size 2 to be appreciated and accepted in the world. And yes, I still struggle with that a lot much like the rest of the female and male population. So much so that when I was getting dressed for work last week and my go-to pencil skirt barely zipped, I sat on the floor and could barely hold back the self-loathing thoughts. So I needed to pick something else that actually fit properly, and it turned out to be a better choice because so many people complimented my outfit, and I realized that the fit I threw earlier that morning was completely un-necessary, and part of the problem.
I started taking cross-fit classes and I actually enjoy working out now. I also really like pizza, and I figured that as long as I'm working out, I should get to enjoy the pizza and all of its delicious-ness, and maybe next week the skirt will fit better.
I've also started understanding why people say, "always have something you love to do". I thought that I had stuff like that, but once I starting my aerials class and hula hooping, I realized that I didn't have something that I truly loved to do and it was just for me. I have never been one to practice anything, (just ask my mom and the clarinet that collected dust during middle school). But, I find myself practicing with my hoops 1, 2, and sometimes 3 hours a day. It's good meditation for me. It's also good exercise and good way to express some creativity.
I guess what I'm trying to get across is that I don't think that I should have to change how I think or what I like to "fit in" and be "that girl". If I could go back to incredibly awkward with braces and bad acne me at 13, I'd tell me that everything will be fine, and that I've made some amazing friends and memories from the new hobbies I picked up along the way. I know I've said before that I needed to stop calling what I do and like 'weird' because they're not. They make more sense to me than I give them credit for, and I'm so happy with that.
Thanks for listening!
Jess <3
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